How do I begin?? My purpose for this journal of sorts is to document my progress from stagnant, stuck in a rut retirement from life to living, vibrant participant in this world of mine. I know, it sounds so hokey, but give me a chance. Ha... a year ago at this time, I was so depressed I could hardly function. Life was a major pain. I mean, literally a pain.
Fibromyalgia has been a member of my family as far back as I can remember... we didn't know what to call it. I don't think the doctors agreed what to call it, or if it really was legitimate enough to deserve a name. We just knew that my mom wasn't well. And then, my aunt was diagnosed with the same ailment. The more we understood of the condition, the more apparant it became that most of the women in my mother's family were living with fibromyalgia to one degree or another.
I was in denial. I was determined to NEVER be like mom. Hahaha! Jokes on me. I was forced to retire from a very good career in law enforcement, due to the pain that had been ignored, while progressively getting worse until it was not possible for me to withstand the weight of my uniform.
So, it's two years after I signed the retirement papers, waiting for disability to be approved, and I'm tired, no, fed up with not living. I've just been existing, living just to get through to the next day. It has taken my car being repossed, a real wake up call, for me to decide that it's time to LIVE.
I intend to document my progress here. Hopefully, I'll find some encouragement, and maybe make some friends, maybe I'll even get a handle on this fibromyalgia and the depression.
I've got so much to write, but I've written enough for tonight. It's way past my bed time. Ha! I'll save the explaination of the name/titles of this little blog for another day.